So I'm back for a bit, with a new challenge that I'm hoping blogging can hold me accountable for quitting: Smoking. Smoking has crept into my evenings and week-ends and I want to stop and find that when presented, I can't resist. I had set myself up multiple times with different rules, new start dates to quit completely have not been able to keep that promise to myself. February 1 was the last nice round number that was going to be a fresh start, but that didn't work out, obviously. I wake up with headaches and ashtray mouth and claim "enough of this stupid habit!" in the morning, and then soon as I walk in the house in the evening, I can't wait for Husband to make a rollie. Repeat!
Happily I'm on Day 2 of not smoking. I started this blog on Day 2 of not drinking over 2 years ago. I just went through a lightening quick session of thoughts saying I should reward myself for that by having a rollie, that drinking was way more detrimental to my health than a couple of cigarettes a day....no foul. But the point is that I have fallen into the habit, I don't like this reliance on it and I can't keep my promise to myself to moderate.
Back to being on Day 2. All yesterday and most of today I've been thinking about and planning on blogging and those thoughts kept me from smoking: even thinking about accountability made me accountable to myself.
Why Day B instead of Day 2? Well, because it doesn't have the same heavy weight of needing the endless counting...Day 8?? of not drinking. At least I don't think it does, so I thought going through the alphabet once to mark the days over the blog might be all I need to cut out this bad habit. A-Z and then done. As I write this, it sounds dumb.
I can drink with the best of them, but I don't want to anymore. But really I do sometimes.