Another quote from Husband. And it is true, since I've stopped drinking I've been excessively productive, more so than my normally kinda productive self. There are two main reasons for this:
#1. Keeping busy keeps me from drinking. I'm substituting activities for when I usually would start drinking. This is especially needed on the week-ends when I would get bored and start drinking at lunch and continue until bed. This probably why we are in a new apartment right now. It was Thursday night I started search online for apartments and Saturday night we signed, next week-end we moved. I've also joined a yoga class and am enjoying the nesting at the new place. I bought a puzzle! Next week-end I have a packed social schedule. Busyness.
#2. This is who I am. I get shit done. I think I was self medicating on some level to control my anxiety and activity. I've always had anxiety about free time, about missing out on life and I can't relax, can't focus. I have to figure out healthier ways to deal with stress and anxiety. When I first started teaching I couldn't turn my brain off to fall a sleep. A drink would help, pot would help, Benadryl would help...a little. But since I've stopped drinking I sleep deeper. I don't need ear plugs every night and some sort of sleeping aid like before. Who would have thought drinking was at the root of both anxiety and sleeping issues?
I was thinking how small my world had become. Everything revolved around drinking. All I needed were bottles at home, a couple bars and restaurants within walking distance and a few friends who drink as much as me. I haven't even been to the pyramids yet! I've been here 6 months and haven't been to really any sights in Cairo, because it all sounded too hard to organize... let's just go and have a drink instead...we have plenty of time to see the pyramids.
I've been wanting to take the dog to go run in the desert for 5 months too, finally I am going this week-end. It is going to make Dog Face so happy. And me happy too.
I used to drink with the best of them, but I don't anymore. I like myself better for it and have a full life because of it.
-Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp