I've been doing the right things this week, why am I dysfunctionally tired? It is Wednesday (my Thursday) and I'm on the early bus home instead of working out because I just need to lay down. I have the kind of tired where my eye sockets hurt and I loose my train of thought in the middle of talking, and can't recall my colleagues names to send them emails. Usually I would blame the midweek drinking on my exhaustion and why I might skip the gym toward the end of the week, now what? Could it be that I over-blame alcohol? Is it that my body is working hard to heal? Can I be healing after 6 days?
I almost missed my bus on purpose and struggled through a workout. But, I decided to listen to my body instead. And I need to rest, not workout. In my research about food, health and my metabolism that led to my decision to stop drinking was many articles about listening to one's body. I thought I was doing that pretty well, but I realized I wasn't in many aspects and especially when it came to alcohol.
When I listen to what my body says about alcohol, I definitely have addict tendencies:
#1. I love the burn and radiating warmth in my body during my first few sips of whisky.
#2. When I get buzzed, I drink faster because I want more of THAT feeling.
#3. I get both irritated and self-conscious when sharing a bottle of wine with slow drinkers. "Why is their drink just sitting there?!?!?" "I can't even top of their drink because its full and mine is empty again" and "I'll never get a buzz this fucking way" and "should I offer to pay more because I drank more than my share?"
#4. My hangovers effect me all day long, I don't feel myself until after a full night of sleep the next day. Yet, I have been known to drink over that hangover and it goes away...until the next day. When I say I don't feel myself, I mean physically sick with stomach issues, getting dizzy, really foggy mind, depressed, and not able to really concentrate on anything, no energy.
Four more reasons why I need not to drink.
I used to drink with the best of them, but I don't anymore. I like myself better for it and have a full life because of it.
-Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp