“You Should Be Proud!”
So yesterday was the most recent “Day 1” sober. And like so many Day 1’s, it was spent in self-loathing reflection as I nursed my hangover. But mixed in was some confusion to how I ended up largely unfunctional from when I woke at 7am to 2pm. What I was confused about was how 5-6 beers led to that! Six IPAs doesn’t seem like that many to have destroyed me like it did.
In I’m talking with Husband about if I should really give up the drink again, he said, “You should be proud that got destroyed after only 6 beers, it shows you are no longer a big drinker!” Ha! My husband is so supportive, but definitely not the accountability partner I need to examine how much joy/sorrow drinking provides me. He was also proud of himself that he felt great the next day, no hangover at all. So strong!
Anyway, we did talk the pros and cons of my drinking as much as it can be interesting to anyone but me. Husband will support me either way, but this time feels less scary to him because we have done this before and our relationship wasn’t negatively impacted by our differing drinking habits. Basically he is fine with drinking alone and doesn’t want to be judged by a high & dry wife. I get it. I do me, you do you. It worked before, it worked quite well.
Come blog on Wordpress. It’s so much simpler!
5/1/2018 09:22:36 am
Just found your blog from a link at Mrs. D website. For a long time, decades in fact, I wanted to drink as much as I wanted without the morning after regrets and shame and self loathing. I could not have the former without the latter. I am on my own journey of sobriety now and wake up most every morning feeling great. My mind has switched from not being able to drink to not having to drink. And that is the best possible mindset for me. Peace and strength to you, and good luck on your journey.
I Will Start With Water
5/1/2018 01:00:06 pm
George thank you taking the time to leave me a message! I’m excited about the changes I will see in myself as I go forward again. And it so wonderful to know there are so many of us out there on “this journey” together: the journey of self-discovery and connection to both our own lives and those of others. Here we are, it’s all we can do.
5/3/2018 08:46:26 pm
Hi! I got your blog from MrsD. I can relate to your journey. This isn’t my first go around but I’m on week 3- feeling good. What happened to you this year? Please share your relapse details! The longest I’ve gone was 4 years but that was like 5 years ago.
I Will Start With Water
5/4/2018 04:19:34 pm
8/21/2018 01:29:40 am
Hi, me again. I've been reading your blog this morning and so I'm commenting as i go. I did Belle's 100 day challenge starting on Jan 1, then promptly started drinking again. You, know, 'moderation". Got myself in trouble, had a new day one. decided to drink again one day (self-medicating to chase away sad feelings), and am now on day 9. I'm going to continue reading. Someone in WA state is here :)
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I used to drink with the best of them, but I don't anymore. My life is so much better for it.
-Mrs. D is Going Without
-The Bubble Hour
-Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp